Hi, the first time I experienced the Holy Spirit was by myself in the back of a car praying for guidance, and this energy, gentle but powerful came on me and started filling me, it felt like hot oil. Slow and gentle very polite. It was getting so strong that I thought I was going to be pulled out of my body and taken away, and I asked for it to stop and it did. I guess I was not ready for it? Then the next day my mom and I had the exact same dream one night that proved my path to the future. My life was transformed after that and my whole life had changed towards God. Then after years of trying to find the experience again, I was told by a friend that a man of God was having God show up at his house and I went. The first time I went to see him, i asked him to pray for me and this presence came to me and started to move on me and that was scary, it felt weird adn strange and I asked what was that? It like just touched me for a moment and I felt very uncomfortable. He said he did not know what it was. It was not like the first time. Then I watch him pray for other people and things were happening. Something was moving on people. He prayed for this one guy and this guy broke out in tears for no reason, I aksed the guy after what happened after and he said he did not know (shouldn\'t he have said I felt Jesus or love?). All he said was he broke out in tears for no reason at all. Another night I was there and he was praying for a whole group of us and I felt a heavy weight on my head and then he said God was putting a crown on my head after I felt it before he knew it, then I felt a hand on my shoulder and he told me God was touching my back, same thing. Like he knew after it had happened. Then another night, I had a bad headache there at that house and asked for prayer got this sudden overtaken rush of the spirit so fast I did not know what had happened, not like the first time, suddenly I was in tears for no reason and they told me about my bad relationship with my dad. Some truthful insights... but i left with no real feeling of love or anything just that experience. Maybe I think that there is suppose to be some feeling of love or personality with the presence of the spirit? Then one day he said he saw an alarm over my house, and the next day an alarm went off and when my wife came home she asked for a divorce and my marriage ended. Wow ... I guess I am confused, because I did not feel love, or the testimony of Jesus Christ the second and third time at the guys house. I started qustioning it and he told me that I was on the verge of blaspheming the holy spirit, but I told him that I did not feel any love with all this stuff, power and feelings. Sure there were gifts there and power no doubt. But there seemed to lack some thing, he was very cold, not a loving touchy type person, he did not hug or give me the warm fuzzies, he said he was a prophet of God, like to OT ones. He was a scarry guy, there was power in that room. I have been confused ever since those nights. I always thought that the presence of the Holy Spirit was love and testified of Jesus Christ? Many church people i knew told me it was the devil imagine what an odd place to be in? I have been to some churches wher the power of God would move on me and it felt different, not like at that guys house. More of a wow factor and inside emotion of awe. I feel pretty dead right now, since the last church I went to I WAS KICKED OUT BECAUSE THEY SAID THEY DID NOT WANT DIVORCED GUYS OR PEOPLE LIKE ME MEETING ANY OF THIER WOMEN THERE. ODD, THE HOLY SPIRIT TOLD ME BEFORE I GOT OUT OF THE CAR THAT DAY THEY WERE GOING TO ASK ME TO LEAVE THE CHURCH TOO. THE KEY WORD HERE WAS THEY. So, I am in a very dry spot right now. PS, I know what you meat by the virtue, its was what happened to me the fiorst time, I knew that if I had touched anyone, they would have been healed. There is nothing like it and I want it back and would give my life to get. To be able to pray for someone and let this virtue flow into them and be witness to Christ is the only thing I would ever want to do. Michael